NY Assault Violinist's Lawyers Say They Know Who Drugged Him

Stefan N.'s lawyer has issued a statement, saying they've identified the person who he says drugged him:

This unfathomable and, entirely out-of-character, incident and Stefan’s arrest stemmed directly from Stefan himself being the victim of a crime upon him. We have identified the person who stole items from Stefan and are working to develop what else was done, including involuntarily drugging Stefan with powerful agents.

Investigation revealed that an as yet unknown person left Stefan’s hotel room with his Ipad, wallet, including cash, credit cards and identification and began using Stefan’s credit cards around New York City, successfully and unsuccessfully, on items that Stefan would unquestionably never have sought to purchase. We have obtained a photo of this person and are working with the police to identify and locate the perpetrator of this horrendous crime.

The upside is that Stefan seems to have aggressive lawyers. Issuing a statement like this during a pending investigation is not something to be done lightly, since (1) it ensures the case stays in the headlines; and (2) if later events cast doubt on it, that could be problematic at trial. Therefore, we can be pretty sure the lawyers are sure of the facts detailed in this statement, which do tend to back up Stefan's story.

As to point number 2, the statement is interesting for what it leaves out, including (1) the gender and background of the suspect; (2) how the suspect got into Stefan's hotel room; and (3) exactly how the drugs were 'involuntarily' administered to Stefan. The statement leaves open the possibility that Stefan invited this person into his hotel room. And it also seems to indicate that whoever he let in -- if he indeed let anyone in -- was stupid, desperate, or high enough to try using someone else's credit card right after stealing it. Not the sort of behavior one associates with guests at a luxury boutique hotel.

Stefan is innocent until proven guilty and may well end up actually being shown to be innocent of any crime, but I have a strong feeling we're going to learn some rather pungent details about his private life.


The Economist on German-Americans

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The Economist gives us German-Americans some respect:

German-Americans are America’s largest single ethnic group (if you divide Hispanics into Mexican-Americans, Cuban-Americans, etc). In 2013, according to the Census bureau, 46m Americans claimed German ancestry: more than the number who traced their roots to Ireland (33m) or England (25m). In whole swathes of the northern United States, German-Americans outnumber any other group (see map). Some 41% of the people in Wisconsin are of Teutonic stock.

Yet despite their numbers, they are barely visible. Everyone knows that Michael Dukakis is Greek-American, the Kennedy clan hail from Ireland and Mario Cuomo was an Italian-American. Fewer notice that John Boehner, the Speaker of the House of Representatives, and Rand Paul, a senator from Kentucky with presidential ambitions, are of German origin.

...

German immigrants have flavoured American culture like cinnamon in an Apfelkuchen. They imported Christmas trees and Easter bunnies and gave America a taste for pretzels, hot dogs, bratwursts and sauerkraut. They built big Lutheran churches wherever they went. Germans in Wisconsin launched America’s first kindergarten and set up Turnvereine, or gymnastics clubs, in Milwaukee, Cincinnati and other cities.

After a failed revolution in Germany in 1848, disillusioned revolutionaries decamped to America and spread progressive ideas. “Germanism, socialism and beer makes Milwaukee different,” says John Gurda, a historian. Milwaukee is the only big American city that had Socialist mayors for several decades, of whom two, Emil Seidel and Frank Zeidler, were of German stock. As in so many other countries where Germans have settled, they have dominated the brewing trade. Beer barons such as Jacob Best, Joseph Schlitz, Frederick Pabst and Frederick Miller made Milwaukee the kind of city that more or less had to call its baseball team the Brewers.

Today German-Americans are quietly successful. Their median household income, at $61,500, is 18% above the national norm. They are more likely to have college degrees than other Americans, and less likely to be unemployed. A whopping 97% of them speak only English at home.

They have assimilated and prospered without any political help specially tailored for their ethnic group. “The Greeks and the Irish have a far stronger support network and lobby groups than we do,” says Peter Wittig, Germany’s ambassador in America. There was no German-American congressional caucus until 2010, though there were caucuses for potatoes, bicycles and Albanian affairs. The German caucus has quickly grown to about 100 members, who lobby for trade and investment as well as the preservation of their common cultural heritage.


Stuffing Pregnant Women with Marmot Meat

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A while ago I visited Zürich and bought this book, Vom Essen und Trinken im alten Zürich ('On Eating and Drinking in Old Zürich'). I saw it at a flea market and just liked the quality -- thick, glossy paper, lots of interesting and well-integrated illustrations, solid and durable binding. A fine example of the bookmaker's art. (You know, real bookmakers).

I've been dipping into it a bit lately, and it turns out to be full of Fun Facts.© As was pretty normal for medieval Europe, people needed protein and ate anything that moved, from eels to finches to sparrows to hawks to frogs to hedgehogs. Smaller birds would just be roasted on a spit and eaten whole, their tiny bones providing the sought-after crunch factor. To conceal the fact that some of these meats are pretty revolting, they would be slathered in fat and whatever spices came to hand. Things got a lot easier after 1500, when trade brought eastern spices, sugar, coffee, tea, and other delicacies first to the rich, then to everyone except the poorest people.

We also learn that medieval and early-modern Germans avoided eating malodorous cheese, giving it the nickname Schreck-den-Gast (scare the guest). During times of scarcity, the Zürich authorities would create exhaustive, precise rationing lists, most of which survive (Remember, they're Swiss). According to one such list, pregnant women were to receive extra rations, including extra portions of marmot (groundhog) meat. 

That'll teach those strumpets!


The Leipzig String Quartet in Happier Times and Now

Here is a review from ClassicsToday (website highly recommended) of the Leipzig String Quartet's performance of Schönberg's String Quartets Nos. 2 & 4:

Soprano Christiane Oelze’s pure intonation and ethereal tone ideally combines with the deep, bittersweet sonorities of the Leipzig Quartet. The German musicians play this cosmic work with acute intelligence and clarity, while their sense of rubato helps them to unveil the music’s most secret and sorrowful expression. The homogeneity of their ensemble playing seems hard to match. Altogether, this performance is one of the most gripping and inspired committed to disc.

Wow! Gotta get me that CD. Now to a much less inviting incident. Stefan N. (see what I did there?), a violinist in the quartet, recently made a very different kind of news:

A renowned German violinist went on a naked rampage at a Manhattan hotel, forcing his way into a female tourist’s room and choking her, law enforcement sources told The Post.

Staffers at the boutique Hudson Hotel at Columbus Circle were first alerted to the bizarre antics of Stefan N. after guests reported seeing a man roaming around naked early Friday, the sources said.

A 64-year-old female hotel guest from North Carolina “heard a knock and opened her door slightly’’ around 8 a.m., a law enforcement source said.

She was confronted by a wild-eyed N. — who recently performed at the Library of Congress — “completely naked,’’ the source said.

The violinist allegedly choked the woman so hard that the blood vessels in her eyes were ruptured, according to a court complaint.

Hotel staff heard the victim crying for help and pulled the crazed man off her, cops said.

N. managed to flee back to his room, but police arrested him shortly after, the sources said.

The victim and N. did not know each other, the sources said.

A source close to the musician claimed that the episode happened after someone slipped a drug into N.’s drink at the hotel bar. He has no memory of what happened, the source said.

But police said that when they took N. into custody, he showed no outward signs of mental distress.

It's early days yet, and I don't want to prejudge the case. Anything from a fugue state to an allergic reaction to a stroke could have caused this behavior. N. is innocent until proven guilty, and I hope he is in touch with the German consulate and getting good legal help. 

However, the source is putting about the story that someone must have secretly drugged his drink. Now, the rumors are true: I used to be a criminal defense lawyer. 'They must have slipped it in my drink!' is one of those claims that upstanding citizens often make when their first experiment with drugs goes spectacularly wrong. (Especially when that experiment occurred in the BDSM-themed darkroom of the Manhole, something you might not want your wife Jill or your managing partner Bob to find out about.) It's not quite as fishy as the evil-twin / parallel universe defense, but it's in the same general category.

Now I am certainly not saying source's story can't be true. Nobody knows yet! But as to the general question of people slipping drugs into drinks, think it through. You're Johnny Scumbag, the drug-slipper. You have just spent lots of your own good money to buy powerful drugs, you're either (1) going to use them yourself (99% of the time); (2) use them to knock someone else out so you can rob/take advantage of them; or (3) trade them for something else you want. But #2, the presumed scenario here, requires drugs that would actually *knock someone out*, not make them allegedly run around a nice hotel naked, allegedly strangling strangers.

The only reason you would secretly slip psychotomimetic stimulants into someone's drink is if you hated them and wanted to put them in danger and ruin their reputation. Giving them crazy drugs to rob them is itself crazy, since they are just as likely to kill you instead (see strangling described above). I know the classical-music world can be a nest of intrigue, but I have a hard time believing someone hated N. that much. In any case, I hope N. is in contact with his consulate and has a good lawyer. He's going to need one.


The Narcissism of Andreas Lubitz

Erica Goode looks at mass-killers-for-fame, the modern-day Herostratuses:

He was described, in the immediate aftermath of the Germanwings crash, as a cheerful and careful pilot, a young man who had dreamed of flying since boyhood.

But in the days since, it has seemed increasingly clear that Andreas Lubitz, 27, the plane’s co-pilot, was something far more sinister: the perpetrator of one of the worst mass murder-suicides in history.

If what researchers have learned about such crimes is any indication, this notoriety may have been just what Mr. Lubitz wanted.

The actions now attributed to Mr. Lubitz — taking 149 unsuspecting people with him to a horrifying death — seem in some ways unfathomable, and his full motives may never be fully understood. But studies over the last decades have begun to piece together characteristics that many who carry out such violence seem to share, among them a towering narcissism, a strong sense of grievance and a desire for infamy.


Am deutschen Wesen, or German Smoothiemakers Show Us the Way

One day, we will look back on the spasms of social-media shaming that are currently in vogue and wonder: what were we thinking?!? I try to make it a habit to think 'what were we thinking?'while we still are thinking it. So I have always thought that the proper response to being called out by tiresome scolds is not the groveling apology your PR firm wants you to give, but either complete obliviousness or a satisfied smirk.

And a group of German smoothie-makers is showing us the way. True Fruits recently started a couple of new advertising campaigns that twisted the knickers of German SJWs. One of their bottles is emblazoned with the logo: 'Get you sausage-like fingers away from this bottle!' According to Indyvegan, a German language website trying to raise a shitstorm (g) over True Fruits, this is fat-shaming, or in German, fatshaming. (Yes, English is the international language of PC scolding. Depressing, isn't it?)

But that was just the beginning. One of their white fruit juices wasn't selling well, so they decided to put it in a black bottle labeled 'Blind Taste Test' and provide the following analogy (my translation):

Ever set up an ugly girlfriend who's awfully sweet with a date? That's what we felt like with our white smoothie, our tastiest smoothie. Because of its pale and unfruity appearance, it wasn't getting near enough chances for a spicy rendezvous with you. So we had no choice but to click off the light so that you could concentrate solely on its inner values. #swallowinthedark

 As Indyvegan then put it, 'Customers felt that this text was lookist (lookistisch, believe it or not), since it suggested you should prefer dark places to get to know people who don't conform to the commonly-held ideals of beauty.' There's more in this vein, practically writes itself.

And then True Fruits did something inspiring. On its public websites, it responded to similar complaints like this. (If you're anything like me, you may want to put on some swelling string music and have tissues ready):

"We took a look at your comments and decided they were totally crackbrained bullshit (the German word is of course Bullshit) from wanna-be moral apostles. After we finished laughing, we decided that even the slightest hint of a serious answer would be a total waste of our lives. So a short piece of advice to all the whiners: if you don't like it, go. Spare us your whimpering, 'cause we like our sense of humor."

"We're good-looking, arrogant chauvinists who don't catch your drift."

"Go cry your eyes out somewhere, you weenie*."

"We're not perfect ourselves and once in a while we encounter statements of jokes that we might feel directly or indirectly target us. And you know what we do or don't do then? We'll tell you: We don't soil ourselves and whine like a toddler who didn't get his second pudding after dinner. You can do that, if your synapses leave you no other option. But please don't blubber all over us."

When Indyvegan the website asked for an interview, the firm took one look at the questions and declined, saying there was obviously no point in further discussion. If you don't like our advertising strategy, True Fruits continued, "we recommend that you and your readers simply avoid our products and our websites in the future." The email response was signed by Fee (Fairy!) Surges, the speaker. They also broadcast a video (g, on Facebook) with a sarcastic fake apology on April 1.

I've drunk some True Fruits before, they're tasty. I hereby announce that in the future, I will be drinking as much True Fruits as my budget allows. 

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