Commencement: Bats & Dementia

Heidelbergerin has some observations on German commencement ceremonies:  

Graduates sat in the front few rows, and each got to invite three people to come see them go up for their diploma. There wasn't any checking of tickets or anything, though. The graduates just dressed nicely - no funny robes or hats. There was one Scottish guy in a kilt. The program opened with some Beethoven on a piano. Nobody processed in, everybody was already just sitting there. Next, a guy with a cool bow tie and hat - the only guy who had any remotely academic costume going on - welcomed everybody, presented something to a couple of the graduates (frankly, I didn't find this part important enough to bother trying to translate it in my head), and introduced the main speaker.

We thought the speaker would say something relevant to the occasion of graduating, receiving a higher degree, education these days, the philosophy of the practice of and research in medicine, or something. But, the talk was actually about dementia. Not that dementia is not an interesting topic, but I totally failed to see how it fit with graduation. The speaker was totally full of himself, but it was at least amusing to watch him up there making animated academic-looking gestures, the likes of which you normally only see in comedy, quoting Latin and English, and being generally dramatic.

Halfway through his incredibly long speech, unfortunately a woman in the audience actually had a seizure and her friend called for a doctor. I think 3/4 of the room stood up. We were also entertained by some cute little bat that found its way into the auditorium and then just couldn't get out again.

After the speech, there was another piano piece, followed by an opera selection from The Marriage of Figaro. Again: huh? The singer and pianist were great, but the relevance of all this was still failing me. Then the graduates received their degrees. First the summa cum laude graduates were called up individually and received diplomas placed inside black folders. Then the rest of the graduates were called up four at a time and received their diplomas stuck inside a plastic sleeve with binder holes. Even though they were called up alphabetically, no advance effort had been made to seat the graduates in any sort of order, so they had to clamber over each other to get up to the front when called. There had also been no effort made to ask the graduates how their names were pronounced, so the MC had to stumble through them on his own, and it wasn't pretty. After this, yet another irrelevant opera selection, then we got to have some champagne and pretzels in the lobby (best part!!!). In all it took two hours.

I love the bat. A delightful detail. The "commencement speaker" was almost certainly a recently-appointed professor giving his Antrittsvorlesung, or inaugural lecture. These generally don't have anything to do with graduation; they relate to whatever the professor's research interests are. (Full disclosure: I'll be giving one of these (g) in about two weeks myself). To an American used to American-style graduation ceremonies, it will probably seem a bit off-putting to have to sit through a lecture on some topic that may be of very limited interest. Certainly nothing like the touchy-feely, brimful-with-hope commencement addresses typical in the U.S.

Signs of my creeping Europeanization appear in my reaction to the commencement address. Sure, the shriveled remnants of the American in me say "Goshdangit! Isn't it all supposed to be about the students? Isn't it their Special Day? Shouldn't they receive congratulations and perhaps some good advice for the road?" The American thinks there's something chillingly impersonal -- and perhaps even sinister -- about hundreds of people being forced to listen to a speech on a topic that is likely only to interest a few.

Then the European retorts: "Ach! You narcissistic Americans! First you shamelessly coddle your college students, inflating their already-healthy sense of self-regard and solipsism. Then, when they finally have to leave college, you shower them with yet more praise, giving them a big pat on the back for having finished college and, at least at the better colleges, warning them about all the Responsibility they will have to shoulder in their important new careers.

But in Europe, young people go to college not to feel better about themselves, but to learn things. The Antrittsvorlesung reminds everyone in the audience of what the primary purpose of the university is: to generate and convey knowledge. And so what if the Antrittsvorlesung might be a little complex? You American always want everything to be fun, perky, bite-sized, shrinkwrapped into easily-digestible edutainment. One of life's more important skills is sitting still and paying attention. Especially to something that may be a bit challenging to understand, or that you might disagree with. And believe me, that's what most of these graduates are going to be doing a lot of once they enter the hard, cold world of real work. The sooner they start practicing, the better.

Let us now draw a veil before the increasingly heated debate between the American and European. We can all agree that not practicing the graduates' names or seating them in a logical order was incompetent and rude. I've never seen a German commencement ceremony where this was done right. Part of the problem is, of course, the authoritarian design of most German university classrooms, which force everyone to cram in beside one another in cramped, narrow, wooden seats. But another reason is the general lack of professionalism in the way German universities are managed. The task of organizing the commencement ceremony was probably just given to some hapless employee of the Dean's Office or to a team of bored graduate students. Nobody has any incentive to put more than the minimum amount of effort into organizing the event. 'The commencement ceremony has always been chaotic and amateurish,' they think, 'and that hasn't ended anyone's career, so why should I kill myself to make this one much better?'

On the other hand, the situation's even worse in France, where, I have it on good authority, the 'commencement ceremony' generally takes the form of a contemptuous, chain-smoking bureaucrat shoving your diploma at you through a slit in a greasy plexiglas window.

Comments

[Vivienne]

When I graduated from my Gymnasium 3 years ago the school and a committee of students arranged a ball. Guys in suits, girls in somewhat expensive dresses. It was held in the centre of our school, the headmaster talked, one or two teachers about how life starts to become serious etc, to not forget where we come from, and also the two presidents of the students union (ok this term was translated by LEO I don't know if it is that correct) talked about our 9 years in that school.
Then everyone was called up front, got the official diploma and a rose and then we had the prom/ ball with a live band etc.

Regarding the age of german students graduating from university: this is changing a lot recently. For my part, everyone in my year is not older than 24, the youngest is 21 and I will be 22 at graduation in 3 months.

[Marcela]

I skipped all my graduations (BA, MA, PhD) because one of the George Bushes spoke at every last one. What are the mathematical odds of that happening? Don't ask me, I didn't study math.

[Onkel Mo]

Reading the description of the graduation events, I seem to have lucked out on this one.
At my University, we actually have two employees dedicated to PR and organizing such events. And they do it nicely.
At my Master's commencement, we had no hats or robes, but were seated accordingly to the order in which we were called to the front. We didn't receive our diplomas, however (most people were actually already in job for a few months) but our yearbooks, which we could then wave in the air while everybody was on stage while people were taking pictures.
The main speech was given by an invited external speaker and quite enjoyable, a second speech was by an alumni, now a PhD student at another Uni, about the hardships of a "Fachhochschule" graduate (like myself) at a University, and the differences in the system (with a final note of "in the end, our system is better", of course).
Musical interludes were there, of course, by the university choir.

I would have hated to sit through an "Antrittsvorlesung", I think.

[Ruth P]

My three kids graduated from American universities with the commencement ceremony, an eagerly anticipated guest commencement speaker, the throwing of the hats into the air, the entire hullabaloo one gets with a graduation ceremony in the United States. And we loved it. The same for their high school graduations. There is absolutely nothing wrong with that. That's the tradition in the US, and hopefully it will stay that way for many years to come.
oh, I'd better interject here that I did grow up in Germany, got married there, and then moved to the North-Eastern US.

If other countries celebrate their graduations different, that's fine, it's really not a contest. The original blogger 'Heidelbergerin' was just commenting on the ceremony, mentioning the difference, not criticizing, I felt. My nephew in Germany had his Abitur, and I was a bit startled that it was connected with a church service. I'd forgotten that religion is part of public school.

After all these years I've come to the conclusion that I like ceremonies, no matter which way they are celebrated - you'd never compare different weddings, would you?

[CN Heidelberg]

Hey Andrew, just saw this! Thanks for the link. (And here I can admit I almost typed Andre instead of Andrew, because Andre Whammel sounds really cool.)
Your reader comments are going all over the place to a lot of things I wouldn't have said myself, which is why my post was mostly just descriptive without a lot of commentary.
I think if everyone had seen this speaker they would not argue that German university commencement is somehow more practical or less pompous than American commencement. This guy was a complete caricature of academic pretense. To take away things like robes and speeches about education is only symbolic. The real problems are still there.

[Don S]

" He started on some obscure, abstract theme that no one could really figure out or understand."

Portugese irregular verbs?

[Don S]

"most of these graduates are going to be doing a lot of once they enter the hard, cold world of real work. The sooner they start practicing, the better."

I absolutely agree with such European clear-eyed sentiments. Particularly the last sentence. The sooner the better.

Which is why I finsd this particular sentiment curious coming from a German. Or so I presume.

In the US college graduation commonly comes between age 21 and 24, unless the student was a late starter and began university after doing something else for a living, in which cases they already have had a dose of the 'real world'.

In Germany graduation from university rarely comes before the age of 28, or so I understand. When I worked there I met with such new graduates aged 29 or 30.

Admittedly these people seemed to be more advanced & mnature than newly-minted US college graduates. But not (I fear) more advanced or mature than American college grads of a similar age who had as many as 7 years of professional practice post-graduation....

[Norbert]

To follow up from the last two comments, I see a difference in that American universities are usually considered, among other things, as institutions providing services to their paying "customers".

That is only very partially the case for German universities. There, students are generally not seen as customers which are provided a service, but rather as users of an (essential) facility that will exist anyway, whether the student uses it or not.

[Curtis]

We also shouldn't forget that a university education in the U.S. can be quite costly. Presentation and style tends to play a significant role in any such expensive investment.

In Europe however, a university education tends to be mostly free and financed by cash-strapped national treasuries, therefore I wouldn't expect most universities to be able to afford lavish, American-style graduation ceremonies.

[Abject]

Many US universities live from alumni donations. They have a very vested interest in making their students' last day there memorable.

[damon]

Actually, the commencement ceremony in question was for doctoral and MD graduates of the college of medicine--just to be perfectly clear.

Also, it was clear from the introduction given to the speaker (and from the details in the speakers speech) that he was invited and not one of the graduates. At least, I don't remember him being handed one of the degrees. Relevance to the occasion aside, what I found amusing was that it was clear more than half-way through the lecture that even most of the Germans had lost interest since more than half of the heads were following the bat around the uncomfortably hot and humid room.

I'm not sure I agree with the assessment of american ceremonies as "coddling" (although perhaps this is the prevailing notion of such ceremonies in Germany) since the solemnity of the ceremony generally increases with the level of degree acquired. In my experience, graduate students are not coddled in any academic system european or american (although compared to the US, what is considered acceptable treatment of graduate students of the sciences in Germany sometimes borders on despicable). A nice ceremony at the end is just there in the US to make the student feel like they really accomplished something through the last few years of unrealistic work loads (to advance someone else's career) and near poverty-level incomes.

[strcmp]

Sorry, but why does it have to be professional? You celebrate the students and not the performance. If you want that, you can go elsewhere. A polished scripted stereotypical celebration focuses too much on superficial things and is not personal at all.

[Wolfram Gothe]

Apparently the effort to celebrate commencements differs somehow from university to university and faculty to faculty. The traditionally held public critic of diplomas ended with a big party.
To get a hold of the certificate as such was however a mere buraucratic act. I feel envious about the pomp and circumstance of Anglo-Saxon commencements.
And you're dead right about the lack of professionalism at German Universities (and Fachhochschulen of course). Probably that won't change neither in near nor in far future.

[strcmp]

This is just like the celebration at the end of Gymnasium, when I got my Abiturzeugnis. Classical music, speeches by teachers about the time with us and hoping to have us prepared for our life, one parent about how we will leave home and everybody will go his own way now, in different cities, and of course an academic 'Festvortrag' by one of the teachers. The music made this a cultural event, the 'Festvortrag' an academic event, all in all it was 'würdevoll'. This is a serious event in life, like a wedding (with music and sermon) or a funeral.

[J.]

American-type graduation ceremonies are silly. There, I said it. The solemnity and stuffiness have always felt over-the-top to this European. I get that you want to celebrate an important milestone in a young person's life, except, in Europe, the thinking is different.
Once you finish school (high school), you're done. You're not a child anymore, you're an adult. And German university students behave as such and are treated as such: no gender-separated dorms, no gender-separated fraternities (ridicilous immature excuses to party and behave irresponsibly, those are), and of course the system of classes was - at least until recently - much less regulated and high-school-like than American college classes.
The German word "Schule" does explicitly *not* include college (the semantically distinct word "Hochschule" is used for technical colleges and universities), unlike the English "school."

I think that's the main difference. These solemn-type ceremonies do exist: for *Gymnasium* (high school) graduations. It appears to me that young Germans are symbolically passed into adulthood much earlier than their American counterparts. So, of course German graduation ceremonies aren't a particular formal affair. Why would they be? The symbolic rite-of-passage already happened a couple years earlier.

[Curtis]

I also attended a university graduation ceremony this past weekend in Austria, which was nothing like what I'm used to in the U.S.

It took place in the lecture hall of the university and was an extremely low-key affair. After everyone took a seat in the lecture hall (there were also no tickets), the graduates simply came in from the side doors and took their seats on specially arranged chairs on stage. They were only dressed up, mostly suits and nice dresses, but no academic robes or hats. The rector and deans were likewise only dressed in suits with nothing to distinguish who was who. Very curious, I thought to myself.

Glancing through the program flyer, the first thing that leaps out at you is the gloriously long procession of titles that each professor had affixed before his name. The most decorated professor had a grand total of 6 titles before his name, if I remember correctly "Ing. Mag. Dr. Doz. Univ. Prof. Kirchbaumer". I shudder to think how the average person should go about addressing such esteemed personages, probably in the groveling position face down on both knees!

First came the welcoming speech lasting about 5 minutes, then came what could only be optimistically referred to as "a type of musical interlude". By music I mean something from the soundtrack of Shack played by a three piece band consisting of drums, bass and guitar. Curioser and curioser I thought to myself...

After this each graduate was called by name and the topic of their thesis work was also announced, which was a nice touch I thought. They came up, received their diploma, shook hands, posed for pictures and then walked back to their seats. Throughout all this there was much wailing and crying from a great multitude of unruly small kids in the audience, who insisted on running around the lecture screaming at the top of their lungs, to the approving looks of their adult care-givers. I've never understood why Europeans insist in bringing such small children to such adult events. Children have a hard time sitting through such ceremonies and tend to express their displeasure using decibels.

After all the diplomas were handed out, which took a good 50 minutes or so, we were treated to another "musical interlude", this one even more wretched than the first. Several audience members used this opportunity to catch a quick smoke outside the lecture hall, refresh themselves with a beer or two or relieve themselves in the restroom, brood of children towing closely behind.

Next came a speech by some professor, and after reading Andrew's blog entry, I now understand that this must have been the dreaded "Antrittsvorlesung". My God, I've never had to sit through anything as long and boring in my entire life. He started on some obscure, abstract theme that no one could really figure out or understand. Then he launched off into an analysis of the origin of certain words, retracing their roots from the germanic to the romance, throughout hundreds of years of history. In the meantime, I wasn't sure if I shouldn't be taking notes for I could have sworn I was back in college attending some lecture in the lecture halls. All around me children were crying or running around the aisles while their adult counterparts were totally engrossed in cell phone conversations or busily munching away on snacks. I seemed to be the only person fighting off the urge to doze off as everyone else had firmly decided to ignore the professor and his speech.

After he was finished, everyone broke out in thunderous applause, which I suspect was more in gratitude for the end of the speech than for the content of the speech itself. Next came a thank you speech by one of the graduates. I was surprised to see that it was not scripted and all she did was literally thanked her parents and friends for supporting her throughout her education. I felt cheated at the end.

Finally another short speech from another ridiculously decorated professor, after which everyone stood up and unceremoniously headed for the doors. All in all, I found the occasion rather irreverent and extremely lacking any semblance of solemnity. After chatting with my friend whose graduation it was, I asked to see his diploma. You won't believe me when I told you that it was a laser printed, very ordinary looking document printed on regular paper with a signature on the bottom - nothing beyond the ability of your average 10 year old. No special typefaces, no flourishes, no stock paper, just complete mediocrity. The most attractive part was actually the casing which was made out of sheep skin!